Think of the last time you were at an industry event, social gathering or even getting your favourite caffeine fix. You start chatting with someone who you are sure you can benefit from knowing or can benefit from knowing you and you reach for your business card as an introduction.
But wait! Have you been actively listening? Or are you mentally preparing your next comment or question before your new acquaintance has finished responding to the last thing you said?
At the Women in Social Business Forum in May, I was lucky to be in the presence of many like-minded women, networking and sharing ideas. It wasn’t until our third workshop, with social entrepreneur and networking guru, Hannah Beach. She was motivational, exciting and inspiring. But best of all, she got us thinking.
Hannah had us pair off with someone sitting close by, it didn’t matter if we had already met. I began chatting with a woman beside me with whom I’d eaten lunch, but there was a catch — she spoke and I listened. Intently. We were not allowed to interrupt with comments that related us to our partners’ stories.
When she said where she was from, I immediately wanted to chime in with “Oh! I’ve been there, I love it!” But I refrained. When she told me about her business, my mind jumped to saying “That sounds a lot like what we do!” But I bit my tongue. And let me tell you, it wasn’t easy.
When we are networking, we are often looking for that “in” moment in our conversation. That time to jump in and promote ourselves. That opportunity will come, but first, listen. Listen to your new acquaintance and ask questions that prompt more stories.
When the time comes, the questions will start being directed at you. Then it’s your time to shine. That’s when you remember all the little things you heard and start relating yourself to all the stories you just listened to. That’s when you can show how you are the same, how you understand them and how you can work together to achieve something great.
At the end of the conversation, pull out that business card. But trust me, they won’t need it to remember you, just to connect with you later.
Tell us about your networking experiences and how you transcend the online space to be excellent in person!